The Old Man in journal format

June 15

It’s been more than a week and father’s health shows no sign of improvement. I don’t know what to do. He doesn’t talk and I am not sure if he recognizes us. At times I see him throw a glance outside the window, perhaps observing the sparrows that occupy the nearby trees. Maybe he’s reminded of his childhood days. I remember how he used to entertain us with stories of his younger days. His eyes would light up when he spoke about the lush green fields that he grew up in. Now, it’s only his eyes that show any kind of motion; every other part of his body lies unmoved.

June 20

I am hurt. I didn’t expect this from Meena. It’s beyond my understanding how she could refer to father as a “burden”. How could she ever forget that it was father who made her feel at home when she entered our family? Father would have been so terribly saddened by her words. I feel glad that he’s no longer aware of what’s going on around him. Today I sat down beside him taking his aged hand into my own.

June 23

Now brother’s wife too! What’s happening to the women in the house? Thank god mother is no longer alive; I would have found it difficult to face her. Well, now that sister-in-law and wife agree upon the fact that my father is a “burden”, I’ll relieve them of their duties towards him. The values and principles that were ingrained in us seem challenged by practical realities.


June 24

The doctor visited to perform a routine check-up. He didn’t have any good news to share. I asked him if my father is aware of his surroundings. The doctor wasn’t sure about it. I must do everything possible to ensure father’s comfort.


June 25

The children in the house make too much noise. I must forbid them from entering father’s room. It’s painful to watch father lying listlessly on bed. I have been administering the medicines for the last two days and they seem to have no effect on his health. I wish there was some way by which I could alleviate his pain. Why can’t God show some mercy?

June 30

The children have been disciplined. I asked them not to enter father’s room. They left quietly without creating much of a fuss. Father looked a bit disturbed today. I administered the new pill that I had brought for him. It didn’t take much time for him to fall asleep. He now sleeps peacefully; the feeling of pain and suffering no longer seems to exist.